How To Get Him To Commit, Already!
You meet a guy who seems to have something “special” about him. And we’re not talking about just another guy here… We’re talking about a guy who is relationship material. The better you get to know him, the more you begin to really feel the connection… and it seems like he feels it too. And when you finally do get together, it feels like magic is in the air…
You intuitively know you both feel a unique connection that could lead to something really special. Life is wonderful… and although you know it’s a little soon, you start to feel like this actually could be “it”. There’s fun, passion, romance. Amazing conversations, laughs, inside jokes…
It all feels so right that it wouldn’t surprise you if you two could spend the rest of your love lives together and stay deeply connected and in love. While you know it’s a little soon to start thinking that way, you make up your mind that you’re definitely ready for a committed relationship with him. You want him and no one else. And you’d like him to only be with you. But the reality is that you don’t know how to tell him the way you’re feeling, or to find out if he really feels the same way.
Although, after all the things he’s said and done with you, and all the time you’ve spent together, you’re pretty sure he feels the same about you. You decide to “play it cool” and see where this leads. But as the days pass, you find yourself hoping he will say something to you… picturing the moment when he will finally open up, share his deeper feelings, and ask you to be “his”…
But before you know it, weeks or months have gone by, and nothing! You find your head filling with unanswered questions: “Where are we going with this?” “Does he feel it too?” “Is he seeing other people?”
You’ve been patient, but it’s driving you nuts… you have to know. You decide to bring it up, in the most casual way possible. But when you do, he just doesn’t seem to “get it.” Maybe he says a few shallow things like, “What do you mean? We’ve only been dating for a few months!” or… “Everything is great the way it is now!” Or worse yet, he completely avoids the conversation, won’t open up, and acts like you are the one being difficult.
Then, over the next few days, he becomes more and more distant. Things definitely aren’t the same. The phone calls aren’t as frequent. Communication seems forced and awkward. And eventually, it stops completely and the unthinkable happens: He’s gone. One minute he seemed to be Mr. Right, and the next he’s gone. And all you have to show for it is a cold, empty feeling in the pit of your stomach.
It really sucks to have already committed your heart, your time, your energy, and your love for the sake of the relationship, and then find out that he’s not even willing to go there with you. So what’s going on here?
Why is it that guys seem to be able to date forever and not even care about experiencing the deep connection and intense feelings of love and intimacy that a committed relationship can bring? If you are like most women, you’ve asked yourself this question time and time again. And unfortunately, most women go about trying to remedy this situation in 1 of 3 disastrous ways:
1. Trying To Convince Him
Just like a pushy salesman trying to get you to buy a car, trying to convince a man that he should be in a relationship with you actually makes him want it LESS.
Why? Because convincing feels unnatural. He realizes that if a relationship with you was what he really wanted there’d be no convincing necessary. He’d FEEL IT emotionally, and his feelings would tell him all he needs to know.
If you start withholding yourself from a man when you don’t get the love and connection you want, or you only “give when you get,” you’re trading. Doing this keeps you from the very thing you want, creating resentment and distrust inside a man’s mind.
You can’t “win” the trading game. Rather than helping a man and a woman closer, it creates mistrust and distance.
3. Giving Him An Ultimatum
While giving your man an ultimatum will definitely get you an answer, when you put a guy on the spot like this, it usually won’t be the answer you want.
Pressure does not change people’s feelings. Especially when it comes to a man’s often stubborn and unexplored emotions.
In fact, often times he doesn’t even know exactly what he’s feeling, because he hasn’t spent much, or any, time analyzing everything on an emotional level.
These three strategies only succeed in pushing a man further away.
In the rare case that one does work, the bottom line is that it’s an unnatural and forced way to get what you want.
It will bring you a short-lived result… at best.
The Only True Way To Keep Moving Deeper & Deeper Into A Committed Relationship So It Lasts
Getting a guy to want to be more and more committed with you can be summed up in 2 simple steps…
1. Make a man feel that he’s better off being with you than being single, spending most of his time with his friends, or “sleeping around.”
2. Show a man, on a physical and emotional level, that he’s better off being with you than any other woman he could possibly meet.
Deep down, being truly loved is what all men want.
But when I say deep down, I mean it.
In fact, for men, the desire for love and intimate connection is often buried under other layers of wiring – such as the desire to do things like provide or reproduce.
With the strong impulses of this other level of wiring, it’s easy for a man to forget about his love wiring. In fact, sometimes men will even think and behave in ways that are in direct conflict with their impulses to find real love and deep connection.
In order for you to make a man feel that he is better off being with you than being single and sleeping with lots of women… or focusing obsessively on his career until he has enough money to support a family … you need to remind him of the benefits that a connected, loving relationship brings… and unlock those hidden feelings inside of him.
Now, this isn’t something you can do just by talking about it. The key is to actually get him to EXPERIENCE those feelings when he’s around you.
Fortunately it’s easy to do – especially when he’s already attracted to you. There are exact steps you can take to turn those feelings of attraction into feelings of intimacy, passion, and long term connection.
And here’s the best part:
Because so few women know how to help a man get in touch with this emotional part of himself, your ability to help him to do it will make him quickly start experiencing a deep connection with you that he’ll want to keep it alive and growing.
It’s like you’ve flipped a secret trigger in his heart that makes him want to be with you night and day… and no one else.
In fact, a guy will not willfully commit to you unless you flip this “switch.” And no amount of pleading, begging, withholding, etc. will work.
Want more of this? Then get your hands on the amazing Catch Him & Keep Him book by Christian Carter (click on photo). He has helped over 3 million women become more successful with men, dating and relationships. He reveals the secrets of what is really going on inside the mind of a man and what TRIGGERS attraction AND those more long-term feelings, through his email newsletter, eBook and videos. For more information the free Catch Him & Keep Him newsletter, click here.